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Mafia Gazette Past Issue 116
The Mafia Gazette Issue 116 For All The News That Is News (E&OE) Saturday 16th December 'TWO MADES DIE IN CROSS-COUNTRY SHOOTOUT ' By John Milton The recent peace seen by our streets was broken today in an intense shootout between two Made Men from opposite sides of the country, Lithium, based in Las Vegas, and Cannibal, who operated out of Miami. There had been heated discussions on the streets between the pair, after a member from The Dandy Highwaymen, Cannibal’s family, allegedly shot at the Las Vegas Made, resulting in Lithium kidnapping and robbing him, releasing him stripped of his guns and ammo. Cannibal was away on business when the event happened, but it is reported that his secretary, Pomona, responded to Lithium’s mails to his Miami HQ, assuring him the matter would be fully investigated as soon as he was back. Despite apparently agreeing to await Cannibal’s return, Lithium was later seen in the streets, telling anyone who would listen of the event, and of Cannibal’s lack of response. Upon his return Cannibal then engaged Lithium in a fierce battle of words, which resulted in a gunfight between three TUQ members and Cannibal himself. It is not known who fired the first shot, but soon two TUQ members were dead, including RHM Sammael, who had recently been surrounded in his own controversy after shooting and killing the son of a long-standing fallen member of his own family, and Venny, another TUQ member. Cannibal then turned his sights towards Lithium, but after a fierce gun battle between bodyguards belonging to the pair, was shot and killed in the city of Dallas. Fleeing from the murder scene to Los Angeles, Lithium was then caught and killed by Jameson, Conceptualist front-man and close friend of Cannibal. It is unknown what will happen now to both families, both TUQ and TDH are left leaderless, and reeling from the bloody battle that has left both sides in tatters. More on this story, and the fate of the two families, when we have it. 'STRANGE NAMED GANGSTER DIES ' By Gazette Reporter Wednesday at 2:12pm DumDum, a respectable Hoodlum from Chicago, was kidnapped in Atlanta and killed. DumDum had just woken up, and headed out of his house to tend to his bar when someone jumped out and tried to kidnap him. He managed to get away, but they continued after him. And after three attempts, DumDum managed to flee to Atlanta where he was kidnapped instantly, and then killed. Authorities are looking into the murder, but it appears that a Mr. Tito Costa is behind them. Police are still looking at all the possible suspects, mainly because it would seem that Tito Costa has now cleared his rap sheet, perhaps causing the authorities to look the other way. The Gazette tried to get Mr. Costa to speak to us about the murder, just to clear his name, but all he would say was that he is a civilian so how is it possible for him to do that. Even though that is his alibi, many have reported of Mr. Costa having his button last week. If it is true, what is in store for this world of ours if Made men are going around and randomly killing innocents for no reason? Editor: Tito-Costa was later killed after trying to kidnap and kill several people. Albert-Neri, the former boss of the Made Man, was unavailable for comment but was said to be furious over his actions. It is rumoured that he washed his hands of Tito and banned him from the HQ last night, after he attempted to kidnap and shoot me, John Milton. 'NEW CRIME FAMILY IN THE PIPELINE? ' By Zinglebert Humptyback The streets saw an interesting development yesterday, when Gazette Editor John Milton posted flyers advertising job vacancies for a family called L’Unione. The previously unknown family is thought to be a long-standing dream of Milton’s, and is rumoured to be in the works for a launch around the end of January. Unable to pin down Milton for a detailed interview, I did manage to get a brief comment from him regarding the family and his aims. “L’Unione is still in its fledgling stages at the moment, so I don’t really want to go into detail, but I have learned many lessons from the mistakes of other families, loose recruiting, lack of control over members and donations, and I can assure you it won’t be happening with L’Unione. I intend to create a family that people can be proud to be in, and one where no member will be unknown or isolated. I want the true meaning of the word family to apply to us. As I said though, it is still in the pipeline, so I don’t want to go into specifics.” Currently based in the city of Chicago, Milton recently turned to crime and is rumoured to be associating with long time friend and Chicago powerhouse Bell. The Gazette is still up and running as normal, so it is not thought this will in any way affect the flow of news to our valued readers. More on this as it develops. 'FALLING APPLES ' By Jerusalem Recent events have given us all the opportunity to see how well a parent raised their child, when the parent dies it is the sons or daughters time to step from their shadow and make a mark on the world. But what kind of mark do they make? Is it one of self discovery, respect and understanding? Not if you’re Lithium it isn’t. He has shown the world an example of what a failed parent can produce. In a drunken stupor LithiumJr tripped out into the streets this evening spouting half truths and one dimensional views, the only lesson apparently learned, and we quote "The lesson being... don’t disrespect family heads" Yet he himself being nothing more then a lowly citizen. He condemned the late Cannibals entire bloodline to a ridiculous threat of vengeance. But as the growing crowd around him formed a majority in opposition to his slanderous and unprofessional words LithiumJr lowly started to hush up seeing his vial words as a lost cause So here’s my take on that, Grow Up! No matter how much you continue to defend yourself or your father the simple truth is that your reputation is shot along with losing what respect your father had left in death. A fate far worse then swimming with the fishes. If indeed the apple does not fall far from the tree then we can only assume Lithium's true quality is reflected in the ignorant words of his son and perhaps the world is a better place without him. 'RISEN FROM THE DEAD ' By Raymondo_Marino Chicago Wise Guy Paulo Gismondo has risen from the dead. His fake death had caused quite a stir in the community as he put family members and close friends through hell with a rollercoaster of emotions. An unnamed accountant approached Paulo on November 30th and said that for 200k he could make him disappear. Pretty soon after the fake corpse of Paulo Gismondo showed up in the obituaries, a funeral followed and both friends and family showed up to pay their respects. The reason for his death was claimed to have been suicide and everyone seemed to believe it. After 15 days of being a mysterious woman Paulo was discovered. He had hidden under the name of Equivocator but was found out after police matched fingerprints. A heavy jail sentence followed and it took a while for the news to set in. Many locals were bemused to see Paulo Gismondo roaming the streets once again. Friends that didn’t know about the chain of events were relieved to find out he was alive. I contacted Mr Gismondo and asked about his reasons for changing his identity. He said he needed a break from it all as there was a lot of pressure on his shoulders, he was pleased to be back at felt refreshed. He said “I have a new lease of life in me”. 'THOUGHT OF THE DAY ' By C.C Anzac Now, it seems to me that even with all these lockdowns, there are still a number of Made men allowed to run around and do whatever they please. I can understand wanting to “Kidnap” friends as a joke, or to practice... However, is that really the right thing to do? Just because you have a skill, or the ability to do something, should you? Example; I have the ability to pee on old women, but do I do it? No. Why? Because I would probably be killed. It seems to me that although there are lockdowns, and rules in place to stop low rankers from testing out how they mug, or shoot, there need to be tighter rules on Mades and higher. Testing out their Kidnapping? Or just doing it because? Then getting nothing but an “Awesome! You got him!” from everyone else? Seems to me that in a world where we want to achieve a nonviolent community, the Leaders need to step up and put a tighter rein on ALL their members, not just the ones who have not earned their badges yet. And this concludes my thought of the day. -C.C. Anzac 'CLASSIFIEDS ' By John Milton Are you tired of displaying the generic grey suited bucket-hat man in your profile? Then mobmail Tiker today for a great new display picture. You tell him what you want, he'll give you a price. Tiker's Displays, keeping you looking your best. 19:18, February 17, 2013 (UTC) Two prime horses for sale. One's a regular racer, one's off season. Taking offers starting at 70k. Contact OtisJr for more details. 19:18, February 17, 2013 (UTC) Staff wanted! The Mafia Gazette is still looking for both regular columnists and one-off articles. Got a juicy bit of info? Drop me a line, if it makes it into a story there could be money in it for you. The news doesn’t tell itself, we need to support of good writers and good sources of information. Contact John Milton for further info.